—He ________ his leg while playing football yesterday.
At your next meeting, wait for a pause in conversation and try to measure how long it lasts.
Among English speakers, chances are that it will be a second or two at most. But while this pattern may be universal, our awareness of silence differs dramatically across cultures. What one culture considers a confusing or awkward pause may be seen by others as valuable moment of reflection and a sign of respect for what the last speaker has said. Research in Dutch (荷兰语) and also in English found that when silence in conversation stretches to four seconds, people start to feel uneasy. In contrast, a separate study of business meetings found that Japanese people are happy with silence of 8.2 seconds—nearly twice as long as in American meetings.
In Japan, it is recognized that the best communication is when you don't speak at all. It's already a failure to understand each other by speaking because you're repairing that failure by using words.
In the U．S., it may originate from the history of colonial (殖民地的) America as a crossroads of many different races. When you have a couple of difference, it's hard to establish common understanding unless you talk and there's understandably a kind of anxiety unless people are verbally engaged to establish a common life. This applies also to some extent to London.
In contrast, when there's more homogeneity, perhaps it's easier for some kinds of silence to appear. For example, among your closest friends and family it's easier to sit in silence than with people you're less well acquainted with.
In 1989, an 8.2 earthquake almost flattened America, killing over 30,000 people in less than four minutes. In the middle of complete damage and disorder, a father rushed to the school where his son was supposed to be, 1 that the building was 2.
After the unforgettably initial shock, he 3 the promise he had made to his son: "No matter 4, I'll always be there for you!" And tears began to 5 his eyes. As he looked at the pile of ruins, it looked hopeless, but he kept remembering his 6 to his son. He rushed there and started 7 the ruins.
As he was digging, other helpless parents arrived, 8: "It's too late! They're all dead! 9, face reality, there's nothing you can do!" To each parent he responded with 10: "Are you going to help me now?" No one helped. And then he continued to dig for his son, stone by stone.
Courageously he went on alone because he needed to know 11: "Is my boy 12 or is he dead? "He dug for eight hours...12 hours...24 hours...36 hours...then, in 13 hour, he pulled back a large stone and heard his son's 14. He screamed his son's name, "ARMAND!" He heard back, "Dad! It's me, Dad! I told the other kids not to worry. I told them that if you were alive, you 15 me and 16 you saved me, they'd be saved. You promised, 'No matter what happens, I'll always be there for you! 'You did it, Dad!"
"What's going on in there?" the father asked.
"There are 14 of us 17 18 33, Dad. We're scared, hungry, thirsty and thankful you're here. When the building collapsed, it made 19, and it saved us".
"Come out, boy!"
"No, Dad! Let the other kids out first, 20 I know you'll get me! No matter what happens, I know you'll always be there for me!"
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think of reach dig out bury |
